not dead, yet, soon to be? probably not

I haven't posted in a bit and I think its partially a way of making it seem like I have a life. (Clearly I'm not blogging because I'm too busy to blog, aren't you jealous of me internet?)

Internet I am lying.

Though I've become more busy. A lot of unexpected things have happened, and I mean that is the name of the blog so what else can I say other than its perfect. I've been here for 3 months now (I suppose more three and a half I guess) and things are finally starting to kind of pick up. I think that last week was one of the hardest weeks that I've gone through. The lack of friends was really getting to me and since I was depressed when I came here its not a surprise that I sometimes have bad days.

But!

I've actually started to get more involved with things which is a Big Deal since I'm horribly shy and sometimes I miss out on things. I actually went to a bible study the other night and found it quite enjoyable (which is amazing for me).

The other thing is that I've been doing a lot creatively. At least thinking about it, but as usual I don't have a platform for anything I think up.

This has been my inspiration lately.

in which i chatter, but no one listens

So I talk a lot to my friends about how much I hate it here. Responses vary between somewhat understanding sympathy and telling me to deal with it because it was my choice (which it wasn't really) etc.

Anyway, the point is that I thought once I got a job and started making money and actually had something to do here that it would, in a way, turn things around. I guess the bright side of things is that it has tamed it a little bit. I'm not hating life with the same sort of passion anymore, but it hasn't fixed what the issue is. At this point I'm not certain what will and I think that's even scarier.

And I don't really want to talk about it with anyone because no one really cares and none of my friends have been around all week which meant that its been a long and lonely week. I never realized how much I rely on the communication I get from the internet (as in, my friends on msn and what not) to keep me sane. That is, I didn't realize how much I needed them to keep me from being depressed until they haven't been around.

consider me impressed

A movie where Sara Jessica Parker doesn't look like a total horse.

Consider me impressed.

the life and times of the new working girl

I'm not a fan of the time I'm actually getting up in the morning, but I've really been loving my job. Its been a while since I was up at 7 am, a time which I made sure I never saw when going through University. I'm lazy and try to find ways to cheat the getting up early system.

So its really not so bad. Everyone I work with is nice. I'm just trying to get into the swing of things. I miss my big city life, but at least I won't be tempted to spend my money.

I am currently listening to a man explain to my father that he should own and be able to shoot a gun as its his spiritual obligation to protect his family. My exact that was "what? wait...WHAT?!"

things i've learned from being unemployed

No matter how much you say you won't, day time TV will become a part of the very fabric of your being. It may not be horrible talk shows (I'm looking you Maury) but at least there are other things to watch. I now know more about wedding dresses than I'll ever need to know thanks to TLC, I know how to handle budgets thanks to Slice and I'm caught up on all my celebrity news.

Sleep schedules don't exist. I think I've gotten up at noon and gone to bed at 2am for the last few months. Which is too bad because the one thing that that is good for is getting fat and being tired all the time.

Also, food schedules. Who really needs 3 meals a day?

I've learned how to live off of $600 and thankful for my parents taking me back in.

I'm sure I could think of more but I haven't got the mind for it right now. Farewell unemployment, I never liked you anyway.

finally things are turning around

I received a job offer today. One that is in my field and something that I should (unless something really odd happens) enjoy. Its here so while I didn't get out like I wanted, at least I can live at home and make money and save (unless Dad decides to start charging me rent.)

So I'm quite excited. Its about time that something happened. Its been 5 months of job hunting, and almost 2 months of being in this place and my life is actually starting to pick up and actually be a life. No more day time tv (goodbye Little People, Big World), no more staying up until 3 am and sleeping until noon and no more feeling like I have no reason to get up in the mornings. I am looking forward to being up (less so that I'm at work at 8:30) and having somewhere to go and things to do.

Its scary though. At this point its not just starting a Job, its actually starting a Career. When did I get to be an adult?